A lovely day at the breakers hotel. Why we never go on adult vacations in the Summer and why you should not either (if you are planning on visiting somewhere in the northern hemisphere).

 

Even the Breakers in West Palm Beach isn't too crowded in the off season.

And the weather is generally fine. Just skip hurricane season. You know, the Summer. 

Vacations should be fun, rejuvenating and unhurried. And un-harried. Overwhelming concerns such as airline delays, overbooked flights, platinum rates for copper level hotels, and long waits at overworked restaurants are all things that a good vacation should avoid. Summer is now a time in major parts of Europe and North America for heat domes, heat warnings and ..... well... excessive heat. If you are a USA citizen traveling you'll be joining tens of millions of other loud, pushy, entitled and unhappy fellow citizens who wouldn't know how to have fun on a relaxed vacation if you paid them to go. It all adds up to a stressful crapfest. 

I am somewhat aware of why people seem destined to do their significant vacation travel in the dead of Summer. It's because their darling children have a long break from school. From the end of May till the middle of August parents are looking for a shot at redemption for having ignored their kids for the larger part of the year and building a warm, cozy and compulsive relationship with their work instead. Maybe a fast tour of France, Italy, Spain and Greece will make it all up for the kids. The whole family can roast in the heat while standing in long lines with each member of the family glued to his or her cellphone. It ought to be illegal. Sounds like tiers and tiers of child abuse to me. Or tears and tears of self-inflicted parent abuse. 

I have what I think might be an interesting solution. The kids would obviously be much happier in their bedrooms texting their friends and playing massively online games. A fully stocked refrigerator is a decided plus. Gratuitously enroll them in some mostly fun "educational" camp for a week or so where they get to design video games or learn how to make their own videos for TikTok and then keep them fed. That's about all they need. So, no big family travel plans UNTIL  the kids are back in school.

Then, in a two parent family, this is where the secret plan comes in. You KNOW that airline reservations and hotel stays drop in price in the Fall by 20-40% for most travel destinations. You should know that all the major cities are less crowded. The lines for museums your kids never wanted to see are shorter by a long shot. Tickets to shows are less expensive. Even the waiters in Paris are less rude. This makes mid-Fall to late Fall and early Spring to late Spring the real prime times for vacation travel. Putting down the computer mouse, kicking off your shoes and enjoying the restful time you've worked so hard to accrue. 

Since you are part of a two party team you divide and conquer all the vacation demons through a totally non-mainstream strategy. Ditch the spouse or partner and treat yourself to YOUR dream vacation for ten days or so. Go to the places you want to go. Do the things you want to do. Eat the stuff you want to eat. All without having to build a consensus or compromise your own enjoyment of your own vacation time. Hubby or Wife or Partner gets to take care of the kids while you are gone. Don't even take your phone. It's not your turn to problem solve or be in charge. 

You really, really want to walk the streets of Rome or Paris or Prague or...(you get the point) with your favorite camera in your hands, catching wonderful images of life. Turn left or turn right. You decide. You aren't compelled to "check in" with your partner to see whose turn it is in the moment to have fun. Wanna stay at the picturesque town square and look for photos? It's your choice. You get to do it. You walk by a restaurant that looks great? Try it, it's your adventure. 

Love a small town you discovered by stepping off the train at random? You don't need anyone's permission to stay a few days. It's  your vacation. 

You decide when to go to bed. You get a break from a spouse who maybe has a nasty snoring condition. You desperately need the sleep. You know you do!!! Now you have a king sized bed and you don't have to share. You decide when you want to get up and go search for coffee and fresh pastries. You don't have to wait for anyone to get up, spend too long getting ready, and then demanding you find a smoothie vendor. Or a cute but pricey brunch spot.  Hell, you can even eat bacon with impunity. 

A side benefit of vacationing alone is that when you come back you and your partner, and perhaps even your kids, have fresh subjects and experiences to talk about over dinner, etc. Your spouse is secretly or not so secretly thrilled to have missed out on all the endless roaming around with a camera in the streets of a city. Stopping, starting again, turning around to get a better shot, and you basically being as random as a squirrel crossing a busy street. He or she will have missed all of that. The impromptu stops to change lenses. The rush back to the hotel to charge batteries. Being forced to stand still and pretend to be the subject of the photograph as you so slyly frame up the gorgeous person behind them with your big zoom lens. 

When you get back home then it's your spouse's turn to travel. Ah, for them the delirious joy of spending time in museums and art galleries without an impatient partner who is constantly ready to head back into the streets to photograph. A charming way for your significant other to enjoy their vacation. 

You wake up in Rome on a mid-October day and decide to visit the Vatican. You remember all the long lines you saw on news stories about the historic overcrowding during July's deadly heat wave. But you decide to go anyway and, voila!, it's late October!!! no big crowds. Just a quick moving line of mostly well behaved professional tourists who have long known that the best time to travel and vacation is when the fewest other people are doing the same thing!!! It's not brain surgery but then again, here in the USA it might seem like it.

B. and I have traveled back and forth to Europe a number of times; for both work and vacations. When we plan vacations we aim for October to the end of November and from mid-January to the first of May. We've done it the traditional way (Summer travel)  but have found that every trip taken in the "off" seasons was much better, much easier and much less expensive. 

We did a trip together to Montreal in November 2019. It was chilly and that made it even more fun for Texans! But it certainly wasn't deep freeze cold.  I liked Montreal a lot. B. was less effusive. Last year I took off time to go back to Montreal by myself and photograph. It worked out well for both of us. There are no kids at home to take care of and each of us really loves the house. So, for B. a nice house all to herself was like a vacation. Seven days to spend, from sun rise till late night, roaming around with a bag of cameras was the perfect (and most relaxing) vacation for me. 

Joined at the hip is great, I guess, if you are newlyweds and terrified to travel alone. But if you are an autonomous grown up quality time apart can be just as good as vacations together. And you get to do it on your agenda, completely. Just don't do it in the middle of the Summer if you can help it at all.

And try not to take too many cameras and lenses. After all,  you won't have someone there to help you carry them in a pinch. 

"I'd really like sushi!" "But I had my heart set on a nice steak!"  Etc. Etc. Etc.